Abortion season is officially upon us.
As we head into warmer days, a lot of women are going to realize how big of a mistake pregnancy is and put their priorities in order – like having a rockin’ summer bod.
As the Republicans attempt to make abortions illegal and effectively subjugate women to their servitude, it’s clear that a lot of women are on the fence about whether to just get rid of the parasite now or let it fester in them until they’re not longer allowed to yeet it.
So we’ve come up with a list of reasons that should push you over the fence into the clinic.
1. Republicans are taking abortion rights
Of course, the top reason is the time crunch. With a leaked opinion drafted by the Supreme Court, it’s clear that Roe V. Wade will be aborted in short time. After that, as far as we know, abortion becomes illegal. We haven’t actually read into it but it really seems that way.
One popular right wing talking point is that overturning it just puts it into the hands of state law which reflects the will of local communities more. However, that doesn’t make sense. If it were just the federal government ordering its states for a reason not granted by the constitution, that would go against the very essence of the constitution..
So, for all intents and purposes, it outlaws abortion so get it while you can.
2. More people are turning Republican
According to Gallup, more and more people are becoming Republican voters despite Joe Biden’s excellent success in boosting profits for the energy and food industries.
This means that your fetus could be subject to the new Nazi America when they get of age.
3. Babies are expensive
According to the USDA, “…middle-income families were likely to spend $233,610 to raise a child from infancy to age 17.”
That’s a big price tag. Imagine buying 233 iPhones but those iPhones cried and shit everywhere all the time. It simply doesn’t make sense.
Not to mention, cost of living is increasing and quality of life is trending down due to something Trump did, probably.
4. Pregnancy is transphobic
We are in an important time where the question “what is a woman” is taking center stage. We now live in a post-science era where we can agree that science doesn’t always get things right. At first, we just wanted to distinguish gender from sex as form of expression but then the trans community informed us that sex is also not based on science or biology so we adapted.
Although we have established, thanks to Healthline’s unbiased reporting, that men can get pregnant and “it’s a lot more common than you might think”, there’s still a lot of work to be done in order to truly deliver a female-identifying person to the capabilities they deserve and need – like baring a child or not getting testicular cancer.
Now, we have millions of women who have penises and no organs to grow a baby or deliver it. This is extremely stressful for those women and your baby would only remind them that, thus far, evolution has been heavily slanted towards favoring cis-hets.
5. It shows your friends that you are a feminist
We live in an era where it’s basically Jim Crow but for women.
Men just want to control women. They say its about stopping us from killing babies, but its really just to make a law that prevents us from doing things we enjoy like abortion.
It is so clearly about controlling women that I can’t think of any other law like this one.
It is unprecedented.
Republicans have argued that an unborn baby means it is murder not self mutilation but that argument has been in the process of being squashed by arguing that just because it’s going to be a baby doesn’t mean it is.
There is a difference between a clump of cells that will maybe be a baby versus an actual baby just like there’s a difference between stopping someone who is going to commit a murder versus stopping someone who just committed a murder. What if they weren’t going to commit that murder? You don’t know.
Anyways, this is totally about women’s rights.
